List of minor Ned's Declassified School Survival Guide characters

List of minor Ned's Declassified School Survival Guide characters

Minor Characters in Ned's Declassified School Survival Guide have been in less than three episodes, or are just not significant.


Chandra Taylor

(played herself) is a person who can do whatever she sets her mind and heart on... and is known for stellar honor and courage... she is a friend of Moze's, the best friend anyone could look for..


(Played by Landon Taylor) Large good-natured classmate of Ned and Cookie's. Although often seen joining groups (Cookie's shyness/Missy's Tips), he may hold a position in student government as he (Randy Jackson) joined Treasurer Lisa Zemo (Paula Abdul) and Vice-Principal Crubbs (Simon Cowell) in judging Spirit Week candidates in a parody of American Idol.

Doug Secksay

Doug is the most popular boy in school and is almost always surrounded by a crowd of girls. His name is a play on sexy. His last name is revealed in Guide to Bathrooms when Moze writes Ned's name on the hottie list.

The Weasel

The Weasel is a "student" (it's in the school roster) who is quite popular. Gordy is always trying to catch it. It is found out on the series final, Field Trips, that the Weasel is actually a mother protecting her babies. The weasel is actually played by a ferret.

Bitsy Johnson

Bitsy Johnson (Played by Spencer Locke) is a popular girl (especially in the first season of the show). Her name could be a reference to Betsy Johnson, a famous fashion designer. She is known all across the Seventh Grade at James K. Polk for getting kids in trouble by making them pass notes. First she writes a note to another popular girl, most of the time Suzie Crabgrass, especially if they are on the other side of the person she hands the note to. She hands it to the kid, and sometimes could make a lot of noise or just time the pass just right. Then a teacher (usually Mr. Sweeney) turns around catches the kid with the note and delivers a "harsh" punishment (usually an essay). Ned Bigby's punishment was writing a 1,000 word report on cell division. Ned and the other students like Coconut Head got their revenge by giving about one hundred notes to Bitsy. Then Ned pushed his books off his desk, and Mr. Sweeney turned around and saw Bitsy. He gave her a 10,000 word essay on Chlorophyll. She dislikes Moze, but is not above openly peeking at Jennifer's test answers to cheat. To teach Bitsy a lesson, Moze once purposely failed an exam--ultimately causing Miss Enstile to force Bitsy to take herself off the Honor Roll Plaque. She left the school in Season 2 and was soon replaced by Missy Meany, who in Season 3 had a crush on Ned.

Sarah Gothman

Sarah Gothman (Played by Olivia Dawn York) is a goth. She is negative and likes Mark Downing. Her name is based on the word 'goth'. She appeared in the Season 3 episode "Positives & Negatives". She helped Mark Downing become happy by dating him. Has not appeared since.


Dr. Xavier

(played by Luisa Strus) is an 8th grade math teacher, presumably from a former Soviet country (due to her Eastern European accent). She is often thought of, like Mr. Sweeney, as insane. Cookie was placed in her class, and successfully caused her to loosen up, and she threw a party. She has some very strange habits, such as placing her face in front of the overhead projector, and has a passion for electricity. Vanessa is also in her class. She once won Bronze Medals in 'old country', presumably her home country. She has a crush on Gordy, referring to him as 'Handsome Cleaning Man'.

Hal Burton

Was the Chairman of the School Board, but was fired for bilking $20,000 from Polk's maintenance budget so he could make a swimming pool in his backyard. His name is a play on words of the Halliburton corporation.

Mr. Gross

(played by Steve Bannos) is one of Cookie's teachers. He doesn't shower or brush his teeth. No one likes being around him. He is the moderator at the annual spelling bee. The first person to misspell a word has to sit next to him for the rest of the bee and read words other students have to spell. Moze had to sit by him when she was the first one that spelled a word wrong. She and Gordy "cleaned him up" a bit.

The Sportscasters

Anytime the action at Polk gets ESPN-style real life sportscaster Van Earl Wright and former Olympic Games competitor and member of the Super Bowl XX-winning Chicago Bears Willie Gault narrarate with play-by-play and color commentary while working for the fictional television station Channel 6-and-a-half Sports, a "station" that was created for sketches on Nick's Saturday Night Live-style variety show, All That.


Cosmo and Wanda

The fairy godparents of Timmy Turner, which in the short titled "Day Dreaming", Cosmo and Wanda appeared to help Ned.

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