MADtv recurring characters

MADtv recurring characters

This article contains synopses for many of the more noteworthy recurring characters and sketches that have appeared on the sketch comedy television series MADtv.

Contents: Top · 0–9 · A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z

24 with Bobby Lee

A sketch based on 24 that features Bobby Lee and a guest on the show. Every sketch begins with Bobby sleeping in his underwear in a certain position. Jordan Peele, Nicole Parker, and Crista Flanagan appeared in the sketches. Celebrities John Cena, Cheech and Chong, David Navarro, John Cho, Jamie Kennedy, and Carlos Mencia have also appeared in the sketches.

3 Minute Meals

Wendy Walker (Crista Flanagan) hosts her own cooking show, where she must make a meal in under 3 minutes. The sketches spoof shows, such as Rachael Ray's "30 Minute Meals." In each sketch, something goes terribly wrong as she seriously hurts herself trying to make the meal. She also gets annoyed as the clock makes a ticking sound. During the run of MADtv, from 1995 to 2009, the sketch appeared 3 times:

  • Tuna Melts - After the pop-lid of the tuna doesn't open, locating a can opener proves difficult. After dropping the open tuna, she scoops it up back into the container, but smacks her head on the counter as she goes to stand back up, cutting her head. Realizing she's running out of time, Wendy simplifies the recipe, but yet cannot open the mayonnaise. As a final straw, she cannot open the bread bag, tearing it apart, finishing just in time with a "Dirty, Bloody Tuna" sandwich.
  • Banana Splits - Soundly slightly more wearied and paranoid, Wendy must microwave ice cream after it freezes solid. While doing that, she discovers that the bananas are rotten. She burns herself on the now-boiling liquid ice cream. With the kitchen being a set, there's no ice or water for her to treat her burns. She proceeds to put the ice cream liquid, chocolate sauce, and more rotten bananas on the dish, but discovers that the walnuts aren't cracked yet. With no appropriate tools, she tries to crack them with her hands and blunt objects, and results in the cracking of her teeth. She then tries a large knife, which ends with the expected cutting-off of her fingertip. After finding her fingertip, she throws full walnuts on the plate. She puts whipped cream on top, ending with topping off the dish with her bloody fingertip, resembling a cherry.
  • Chili Dogs - Filmed "on location" at the University of Michigan's football stadium's parking lot, wardrobe has put Wendy in an Ohio State sweatshirt and locates her on the Michigan side of the parking lot. She is therefore the target of several acts of hate from Wolverines fans, being on the receiving end of footballs, drinks, and obscene insults. When she gets the hot dogs out, she finds that they have been frozen solid inside the cooler. She tries prying them apart with a kitchen knife, but a frozen splinter of hot dog flies out and gets in her eye. She then goes to turn on the grill, but it has already been turned on and is hot, and she drops it on her open toes, burning them. She goes to get the pre-made chili out of her car, but while inside, gets blocked in by a Michigan fan (Matt Braunger). Setting off the car alarms of both cars on either side of her, she ends up climbing out of her sunroof with the crockpot of chili. She slides off the car and lands face-first on the pavement while being pelted with more footballs, but saves the chili. As her time runs out, she is prepared to serve the chili as the meal, but as a possible end to the series, Wendy is suddenly run over by a van.

Bae Sung

Bae Sung (Bobby Lee) is an Asian American man who has held several jobs, mostly as a translator. However, no one can understand him because he speaks the language described once as "Dumbass." In a few of the sketches, most of them involving Ike Barinholtz, Bae Sung answers a series of questions in gibberish, followed by his catchphrase, "Uh-oh, hot dog!" (On one occasion, he was tackled by a man in a hot dog suit).

Bae Sung appeared to be killed off in season 11 in a sketch involving the Taiwanese Triads and the cast of The Sopranos. He was then ground up into hamburger meat by Paulie Walnuts (Barinholtz) and Silvio Dante (Frank Caeti) and consumed by Bobby Lee, who promptly got sick and defecated Bae Sung into a toilet. (The sketch's final scene shows the feces swirling around and going down the drain.) However, he reappeared in season 12 in a parody of Medium, as a translator for a future murder victim who speaks Korean. Allison DuBois (Crista Flanagan) was unable to save the victim due to Bae Sung's poor translation. The coroner, also played by Bobby Lee—and also named Bae Sung—spoke perfect English. Bae Sung returned in Season 14 as a translator for a businessman (Keegan-Michael Key) in charge of the Super Bowl Halftime Show.

Coach Hines

Coach Sandoval "Sandy" Hines (Keegan-Michael Key) is a short-tempered, energetic, booty shorts-wearing, gum-chewing high school gym teacher, who works at a Catholic school called St. Francis High.

Hines easily becomes upset by inappropriate behavior from unseen students during school assemblies and threatens to kill and injure them in response. However, he is far more disruptive than the students, Many of his threats involve bodily organs, such as the sigmoid colon and the duodenum. Hines also uses death threats such as: "I will stab you in the neck with a pencil!", "I will punch your heart through the back of your body!" and "I will set you on fire!" Principal Lankenstein (Ike Barinholtz), Coach Hines' nemesis and the principal of St. Francis High, appears to dislike Hines because he always interrupts Lankenstein's speeches during school events, and they end up fighting at the end of some sketches. Barinholtz also plays a student in some sketches. Despite acting mean and tough, Hines is actually a very loving and caring man. Hines' foils are Joseph Yamanashi (who credited himself as "Terry Yamanashi" in his own video, Coach Hines: Ready, Set, Die. It is revealed in his final appearance that his last name is really Heinz, and he's the heir to the Heinz ketchup fortune.

One of the students, Yaminashi (Bobby Lee) often heckles Hines and becomes a recurring target for Hines' threats.

Coffee Twins

Two office workers (Crista Flanagan and Arden Myrin) are always cracking jokes in their work place. Typically, Arden's character tells a joke, and both laugh for literally hours on end. One example of this was when Crista's character said, "What time is it?" and Arden's replied, "Time to leave!", while it was 11:00 in the morning. When others don't laugh at the joke, Arden's character swears and breaks things, often leaving Crista's character to either follow her or stay behind. When Arden's character would sometimes tell the joke to her husband (Bobby Lee), he would say he doesn't get it and she'd usually explain it to him. They were first introduced when they both had the same coffee mug, hence the name "Coffee Twins."

Eddie Thundercloud

Edward "Eddie" Thundercloud is a Native American man (Keegan-Michael Key) living in today's society. He tries to counter all the racial stereotyping from other people, such as people making a war chant when he enters. He also made presidential commercials saying that his ways would bring peace to America, most of which involve doing drugs.

Eugene Struthers

Eugene Struthers (Keegan-Michael Key) is a water delivery man who accosts unsuspecting MADtv guests backstage. His catchphrase is "Ho' Nuva Levo" (Whole 'Nother Level).

Jorge

Jorge (Keegan-Michael Key) is a short-tempered Mexican immigrant, who works at a fast food restaurant. When disgusted by the meal choices and cooking procedures at the restaurant, Jorge will recite long, overly dramatic soliloquies about his Mexican heritage. Whenever the customers pronounce any Spanish word wrong or order an inauthentic menu item, Jorge assaults them, either verbally or physically (for example, when a customer orders "cinnatwists" from the menu, Jorge brandishes a knife from his boot and stabs the customer). Jorge's supervisor is a put-upon black woman suffering from herpes and a nicotine addiction named Loretta (Daniele Gaither) who yells, "Jorge!" (her catch phrase) whenever he assaults the customers. When Jorge is assaulting the customers and is caught by Loretta, he quickly gets back to the prep line and pretends to push the oven buttons, or pretends to mix. However, Loretta tells Jorge to stop doing the fake stuff, proving that Loretta is smarter than Jorge.

Jorge has long, black shining hair that he flips during his soliloquies.

Jovan Muskatelle

Jovan Muskatelle (Keegan-Michael Key) plays as an African-American with no shirt on and a shower cap on his head, who usually appears in news bits done by other cast members. When asked what he saw, he describes in a very energetic way, often hopping around, talking fast, and yelling out his catch phrases "It was crazy as hell!" or "It was pandemonium!". He often reappears to say more despite what the other actors may be doing.

James and Andra

Played by Josh Meyers (James) and Michael McDonald (Andra); a gay man and his best friend. While James is calm and easy-going, Andra is nervous,and is prone to nervous outbreaks while shouting obscenities (i.e. "OmiGod this is such bulls**t!!").

They have appeared in parodies of "Boy Meets Boy", "Scare Tactics" and "Hollywood Squares".

Luann Lockhart

Luann Lockhart (Crista Flanagan) is a stand-up comedienne notorious for her poor delivery, lack of punch lines and frequent bouts of crying. Her material includes bits about her abusive ex-boyfriend and terribly unfunny observations about everyday life. Luann's jokeless routine is mostly made up of nervous laughter and long pauses. Her catchphrases include, "Wait, I have impressions!", "I'm only fooling!", "But seriously...", "Now, let's go to the audience", "Let's not get started on men", "Will you talk to me?" and "Let me tell you about my ex-boyfriend." Eric Price appeared in a sketch as Luann's ex-boyfriend.

Many Shows! With Johnny Gan and Pongo

First introduced in a season 12 sketch, Xing Lao "Johnny" Gan (Bobby Lee) is a Thai millionaire known for his desire to do women "hard and sloppy, the Johnny Gan way." He and his friend Pongo (Danny Cho) host the show on Thailand public-access television cable TV channel 43-C. Segments have included parodies of Jackass, Dancing With the Stars, cooking shows, and movie reviews. Johnny reported several movies as "two thumbs down" because there was no scene with him in it. His trademark catch phrases such as "Hello Thailand!" and "'Ello Pongo!" feature his characteristic, harsh accent.

Nacho Hernandez

A Mexican man (Johnny A. Sanchez) who also goes by the name Lil' Joker. He often annoys reporters who try to ask him serious questions. He has many friends and often shows up at openings for no apparent reason.

Razzle Dazzle

Razzle Dazzle (Keegan-Michael Key) is a homeless man who is also a motivational speaker. He has a lisp and speaks on behalf of the poor and homeless. He also believes urinating in public is an art, and should be practiced.

Tank

Tank (Bobby Lee) is an Asian-American "Street Tuner" character in the style of the film The Fast and the Furious: Tokyo Drift. Tank drives a tricked-out Daewoo Lanos (with the registration "PASSONU") and has his brother sit in the back of his car making it bounce, play music and turn on underglow lights when he shouts commands. When his brother complains about the conditions inside the trunk, Tank will slam it down on him again. Bouncers will not admit Tank into nightclubs, so he tries to pick up girls outside the clubs and impress them with his car. When he sees a girl he does not find attractive, he replies with "PAY-ass!" or "Pass!" When he finds an attractive one, he would invite them into his "Dae-WWOOOO!" and switch it "from duty mode to Booty MODE!" Tank shows off for girls by sliding across the hood of his Daewoo, but he typically falls hard to the ground (and Lee often exhibits what appear to be rib or elbow pain as a result).

The Blind Kung Fu Master

A blind kung fu master (Bobby Lee) who appears out of nowhere to do heroic stunts—for example, stopping thugs from harassing a senior citizen. Almost without exception, however, he fails miserably because, unlike the blind martial artists whose other senses are heightened, the Blind Kung Fu Master is truly handicapped by his blindness; he runs into solid obstacles at full speed, cannot find the villain to strike at him or her, and often attacks the wrong person. (The only real exception to his string of failures was his attempt to defeat an evil wizard and prevent him from ruling the world by destroying his talisman, which would destroy his power; after witnessing his blind bumbling, the wizard was overconfident and did not try to stop him, expecting him to fail, but he stumbled onto the means to destroy the wizard's talisman by sheer luck, and succeeded before the astonished wizard could stop him. He was as surprised as anyone that he won, and performed a little dance of joy at finally winning a victory.) People are always exploiting his blindness to play jokes on him; for example, when he was learning the martial arts, his teachers, instead of giving him the proper dragon tattoo, gave him a tattoo of a little girl with a balloon. At one point, by sheer chance he temporarily gained his sight and said "I've never seen myself before," implying he was blind since birth. (The first thing he cared about seeing most was computer porn—chunky Milfs). During the brief period he had his sight back, he easily outfought the villain (noting how much easier it was to fight when he could see), implying that, despite his usual incompetence, he is a legitimately trained and dangerous martial artist. The sketeches often follows a pattern: 1. First the villain of the sketch is about to/does something evil then they hear a whisper then TBKFM comes in saying "It is I! the Blind Kung-fu Master!" then shows of some of his "skills" then walking into something. 2. He accidentally attacks the victim of the villain(s). 3. Then after a conversation he pulls of a deadly weapon then finding out its something completely harmless (example: pulls out a sword which is actually a feather duster). 4. Often complains that his enemies should help him because he's blind. 5. Embarrassing himself. 6. Then charges towards a wall or window.

7am Condo Report

7am Condo Report is a show hosted by elderly condo owners Muriel Westig (Stephnie Weir) and Clifford Busley (Ron Pederson). Muriel nearly always has at least one stroke during the show, which she always simply fights off through sheer willpower and continues. Clifford is in a wheelchair, which he often has problems with. Jelly Mae Jackson (Danielle Gaither) is the show's entertainment reporter. After Ron Pederson left MADtv, Muriel Westig appeared in other sketches, like The Silver Fox, with Michael McDonald. Muriel's catchphrase is: Not today Lord! (while she's having a stroke).

Abercrombie & Fitch Employees

In a parody of Abercrombie & Fitch's advertising images and hiring practices, Ron Pederson, Ike Barinholtz, Josh Meyers and Michael McDonald played store employees with names like Dutch, Cougar, Storm and Carpenter as vain, vapid, unhelpful and overly coiffed gay men. They would insult customers, particularly women, minorities and the overweight. The recurring sketch often parodied alleged racist hiring policies. Aries Spears, Keegan-Michael Key, and Jordan Peele appeared as African American employees- Panther, Midnight and Stingray. Despite appearing athletic, the characters were depicted as weak and cowardly; in one skit they were beaten up by Lane Bryant employees for popping their tires because they were taking up staff parking spaces. One sketch featured Bobby Lee as an employee named Turtle, unlike the other employees Turtle was helpful and nice to the customers.

Angela Wright

Angela Wright (Stephnie Weir) is an eighth grade girl at Boyd Junior High, who typically appears on film. Angela often videotapes history projects for her teacher, Mrs. Rogers. Debra Wilson played Angela's African-American best friend, Beth, and Josh Meyers played Billy Wright, Angela's brother. Paul Vogt plays Natalie, Angela's overweight Canadian cousin. Angela's recurring quotes are: In 3, 2, 1. Hi. I'm Angela Wright, eighth grader at Boyd Junior High School, and this is my social studies project entitled... and I don't understand this!. Angela frequently makes home movies in order to prove her theories, which are mainly stereotypes (i.e. Old people hate black people). Despite her theories and unshakable belief, everything she films ends up being contrary to her thesis, the end result is usually she sets the stage for a positive relationship involving everybody except her.

Antonia Timmens

Antonia Timmens (Nicole Sullivan), who spoke with a noticeable lisp and may have been mildly retarded, found everyday activities and normal conversations challenging.

Skits featuring Antonia usually showed her attempting to perform a variety of jobs clearly beyond her limited abilities, such as answering a suicide hotline, piloting an aircraft or creating simple signs. Other characters became increasingly frustrated by her, particularly when she would respond with one of her inane catchphrases, such as, "I have a cat named CeeCee." (pronounced "Thee Thee" due to her lisp), "It is possible," or "I don't know."

Phil LaMarr usually appeared as a character in Antonia's sketches, even revealing in one sketch that he has played the same character in all of the sketches. In a game show sketch patterned like The $25,000 Pyramid or Password, LaMarr's character tries to describe the word "Cat", to which Antonia repeatedly says "CeeCee". When time runs out, LaMarr's character asks what a "CeeCee" is, to which Antonia replies, "CeeCee's my cat..."

Taedo-Attitudes and Feelings, Both Desirable and Sometimes Secretive

This Korean soap opera parody centers around the adventures of Dr. Poon Ji-Sum (Bobby Lee). He is in love with Ms. Long Bong (Cathy Shim), and has many run-ins with President Gin Kew Yun Chun Yew Nee (Sung Kang) as they fight for her affections. At the end of each episode, a shocking twist is revealed. A running gag is that sometimes what appears to be a short phrase spoken by the cast appears to have an extremely long translation (the entire sketch is done with subtitles), or vice versa. A notable sketch guest stars Edge as Dr. Cornell Overstreet of the Ontario Overstreets, who is described as "not a Korean man, but a vengeful Canadian."

Alison

Alison (Alex Borstein) is a young office worker with an odd habit of expressing her private thoughts by breaking the fourth wall and singing in the manner of a Broadway musical, while the people she is with become stunned and shocked as they hear Alison's views about them.

Average Asian

This series of skits involved Haidiki (Bobby Lee) in different situations in which the people around him say stereotypical things to him, believing that he does things like knowing martial arts, having the ability to fix electronics, and likes eating sushi among others. However, out of these various stereotypes, only two were proven truthful, one involving ninjas where Haidiki summoned a pack of ninjas at his tormentors when he is too annoyed on his birthday and one where he proved he was an expert Ping Pong player.

Bible Dude

A series of sketches satirizing the evangelical superhero Bibleman with Michael McDonald as Bible Dude, a Christ loving superhero who stops children from doing things forbidden by the Bible. The sketches were a television show on the PAX television network. If anyone says or mentions something that's considered a sin (ex: killing a person), he would read a passage from the Bible, but often the passage would be completely unrelated to the topic at hand. If somebody still sinned or questioned Bible Dude, he would zap them until they are just a skeleton. Aries Spears occasionally appeared as Jesus Christ.

Debra Wilson as Bunifa Latifah Halifah Sharifa Jackson.

Bunifa Latifah Halifah Sharifa Jackson

Bunifa Latifah Halifah Sharifa Jackson (Debra Wilson) is a meter maid from Hawthorne, California, who makes extensive use of ebonics when speaking. She is arrogant, rude, ghetto and insensitive to others; if they become frustrated or fed-up and complain, she quickly accuses them of being racist. She is quick to label other characters' most basic assertions as being motivated by racism. Her character often rapidly shifts her mood at mild stimuli for comedic effect, aggressively arguing with characters one moment, then talking daintily with them seconds afterward. When someone shorts her name to "Bunifa Jackson," she promptly corrects them by saying, "That's Bunifa Latifah Halifah Sharifa Jackson, you need to respect a sista's name." She is often seen gabbing on her cellphone with her unseen best friend Sonya (who was once voiced offscreen by Aries Spears). She often flirts with male characters, regardless of race.

Her catchphrases include "I saaaaaaaaaaaid..." (usually without having previously said what she is referring to and almost always following a readjustment of her bangs), "What'd I do?" which sounds more like "wharrrrrrrrrrrrr I do?" and "Why I gotta [perform an action]? (Is it) because I'm BLACK?! Is that it?!", or "You saying black people too [adjective] to [action]!?" An early form of this character appeared in season one, but she was a doctor and more articulate.

Cabana Chat

"Cabana Chat" was a recurring skit during the second and Third seasons of MADtv. The hostess was gleefully lecherous Dixie Wetsworth (Mary Scheer), who had a deep tan, wrinkled skin, and a country club lockjaw accent. She was prone to broad double-entendres and flirted with all males who appeared on "Cabana Chat", including the beautiful but dim-witted Pool Boy (Bryan Callen) and her highly effiminate musical director, Dexter St. Croix (Orlando Jones). In the third season, Dixie revealed that Pool Boy and Dexter left the show so, James Brown Jr. (Aries Spears) took over as musical director and co-host. The similarities between Dixie Wetsworth and comedienne Phyllis Diller were underscored when Diller appeared on "Cabana Chat".

Dixie Wetsworth's catchphrase was "This is 'Cabana Chat', and this (gesturing to her scantily clad body and cackling) is Dixie Wetsworth. You like? I like."

Cindy Delmont

Cindy Delmont (Paul Vogt) is a morbidly obese woman. Although she is morbidly obese, she seems to find herself attractive, and is oblivious to people's patronizing and insulting comments towards her.

CLOPS

CLOPS was a MADtv parody of the Fox show COPS done entirely in claymation. It typically featured police officers pursuing and arresting (and sometimes mistreating) popular cartoon characters or toys for various crimes, such as arresting Gumby for robbing a convenience store, G.I. Joe and Barbie for a domestic dispute and disturbing the peace, Santa Claus for driving drunk and smuggling cocaine, the Rock-Em, Sock-Em Robots for brawling, Wallace from "Wallace and Gromit" for animal abuse (of Gromit), Mr. Potato Head for public drunkenness, and Paddington Bear for indecent exposure.

In one episode, a rampaging Pillsbury Doughboy was shot repeatedly but the bullets had no effect on his doughy body (even reacting to the gunshots with his signature "Hoo-hoo!" laugh), so he was pushed into an oven and baked, paralleling the ending of Terminator 2. Other characters included the Energizer Bunny, Furbies, a California Raisin, Mr. Peanut, Teletubbies, the M&M Candies, the Budweiser Lizard, and the Budweiser Frogs.

Cloret

Cloret (Debra Wilson) is an unenthusiastic, lazy, depressed woman who routinely takes on customer service jobs. When angered she dons a distinctively wide-eyed look and finds the nearest microphone to shout into. She only appeared in two sketches, but has worked at a juice shop and as a gate agent, security officer and pilot for United Airlines. She mentioned in her last appearance that she is supposed to be on Wellbutrin, but it makes her too aggressive with her kids. She mispronounces words and names often, then makes fun of them or the people attached to them when corrected. Her catchphrase is "What'chu want?", which she sometimes says while cutting off her own sentences.

Clyde and Judith

Clyde (Michael McDonald) and Judith (Nicole Sullivan) are a couple who attend venues such as sports meets, parades, and school plays. They are always giving a scathing commentary on their observations, always qualifying their comparisons with "Literally!" even though their opinions tend to be hyperbole. For example, when Clyde arrives late to a junior high swim meet, Judith tells him, "You were gone for so long, that I literally went through menopause." Clyde and Judith attend such events only for their pleasure, as they have no children of their own. Sketches end with an outraged parent insulting them back, again with excessive use of "literally," and an announcer stating something along the lines of "What will Clyde and Judith do next?"

Crafty Gals

Sisters Denise (Crista Flanagan) and Kendra (Arden Myrin) usually appear at their stand selling their hand-made crafts (with the catchphrase "Are you jazzed for crafts?"). Both are very nerdy and somewhat naive, and have very low standards when it comes to men (they fell for a white trash type truck driver, two obese brothers, a rude black man, and so on).

Darlene McBride

Darlene McBride (Nicole Sullivan) is a country music singer with an oversized hairdo who often sings about her far right, racist, sexist, homophobic, strict fundamentalist and anti-Semitic worldviews, parodies of several politically conservative country singers from real life. Her extremist views include:

  • "The Lord loves the NRA, He told me so the other day; He spelled it out in bullets in the sky. He's sittin' up in heaven with his AK-47, He's a rough-and-ready macho kinda guy."
  • "'Scuse me Mister Negro, but I'd like to ask you a question: What's so bad about the back of the bus? You still got a seat like rest of us. I don't understand all the fuss 'bout you sittin' in the back of the bus."
  • (talking about America) "And now look at it, a big ugly meltin' pot just boilin' over on what used to be a nice WHITE stove."
  • "Love comes in many colors but it looks best in white" (winks at audience).
  • "Jesus was never a Jew. Forget what you've heard, it's not true. The babe in the manger was no Hebrew stranger. Jesus was never a Jew." (spoken) "Sorry folks, his last name was Christ not Christowitz, nice try."

McBride gave her young sons (John and Wayne) assault rifles as Christmas gifts in one skit, and later blamed their subsequent injuries on lack of school prayer. A map showing the stops on her "Take Back America" tour created a swastika pattern. She also released a rap album entitled The Marshall McBride LP after Eminem "made hate cool again".

Darrell

From the famous, "Can I Have Your Number" skits that have 2-25 million views on YouTube, Darrell is most famous for being somewhat of a stalker when he meets girls. He constantly asks them for their number, if they have a boyfriend, and if they would like to go out with him. His famous quote is, of course, "Can I Have Your Number?" He often says that his name is spelled like Darrel, but it's pronounced like Durel. Despite being a man in the skits, Darrell is actually played by Nicole Randall Johnson.

Dolomite

Dolemite is based almost exactly off of the 1975 blaxploitation film superhero Dolemite.

Dorothy Lanier

Dorothy Lanier, portrayed by Stephnie Weir is an intense, charismatic woman devoted to the craft of acting. She is wildly melodramatic and will react with devastation at the mere suggestion that she is a lousy actress. Dorothy Lanier's bright red bowl cut hairstyle and her long silky scarves are her most recognizable traits.

Dot Goddard

Dot Goddard (Stephnie Weir) is an unintelligent, kooky, neglected, hyperactive, gum-chewing 7-year-old girl with ADD, who has an enormous child-like imagination. It is revealed that her real name is Penelope in one episode.

Dot's chubby prostitute twin sister, Karen Goddard (Alex Borstein), is a child genius, who has led NASA expeditions.

The parents, Ron Goddard (Michael McDonald), and his wife, Wesley Goddard (Mo Collins), are very proud of Karen, but treat Dot (who seems to be completely unaware of the feelings (especially her father) show towards her) with contempt, including child endangerment and abuse. Ron attends AA and has been arrested for DUI, all revealed by Dot.

Despite her genius and ability to perform advanced scientific procedures, Karen appears to genuinely care about her twin sister and to enjoy spending time with her in childish activities, and never seems to notice the hostility and utter cruelty her parents show towards Dot. After Alex Borstein left the show, Dot still appeared in skits, typically with one of her parents wearing a shirt that said, "My Other Child Is A Genius."

Dot is obsessed with gloves, wearing them pretty often, and getting desperate when she cannot wear them. She usually tries to entertain people by saying, "Look how little my gloves are. How are these ever gonna fit on my hands?". Then, she puts them on and says that it's magic. Also, whenever her hands get sweaty in her gloves and she takes them off, it's always revealed that she's wearing another glove (at which Dot is shocked).

Dot usually makes her dad become even angrier when she mentions embarrassing, but-true, statements about his life that he otherwise would've wanted to keep secret.

Dot is shown as a very outgoing girl, who cannot stop talking about irrelevant things, but gets extremely shy when she is expected to talk. She expresses her shyness by fidgeting on the spot and sometimes asking, "How come everyone's looking at me?". She has shown interest in making a deal with the Devil.

Dot treats God and Jesus as her close friends as she talks about Them in humorous ways. She even play jokes with Jesus. Her parents (even Karen), however, do not show belief in Them (they are just not very religious people). Dot believes in magic, witches, and even Santa Claus, even though her parents and Karen believe that there is a scientific explanation for everything.

Ron's original name was "Howard".

Dr. Kylie Johnson

Dr. Kylie Johnson (Stephnie Weir) is a doctor with various specialties. She constantly plays practical jokes on her patients, wears belly-shirts, decorates her pencils and stethoscopes in pink fun fur, and generally never seems to take her job seriously. Despite her antics, she is a genius in the medical profession, and her colleagues regard her as one of the best in her field. She even studied in a law school but she did not pass the bar exams. Some of her antics include having a squirt gun fight in the emergency room, pretending that one of her pregnant patients gave birth to a teddy bear, comparing a man's sperm to N'sync("'That's just an old picture of N'sync...' 'Exactly, and your sperm is just as tired and there's only five of them,'"), and pretending to record a dating service video on a proctological camera.

El Asso Wipo

El Asso Wipo is an Argentine wrestler seeking work on the American wrestling circuit. He has been played by David Herman, Chris Hogan, and David Arquette during a guest appearance. After the debut of El Asso Wipo, other wrestlers with offensive names were introduced, including El Diablo Negro (The Black Devil) and Señor Bag of Crap. El Asso Wipo's catch phrase is "I will break jur (your) back, like so, with my knee!"

Emcee Esher

Emcee Esher (Aries Spears) is a fictional hardcore rapper who uses constant (censored) profanity and has extremely vulgar, though very short, music videos, which are censored heavily on TRL. He has released 14 albums since his death in 1998 and made numerous appearances on MTV TRL. His name is a reference to artist M. C. Escher.

Funkenstein against...

A blaxploitation short based on Frankenstein. It follows the adventures of Funkenstein (Jordan Peele), Dr. Funkenstein (Keegan-Michael Key). Each episode is filmed to parody the movie styles of the 1970s with bad acting, jittery editing, horrible camerawork and common 1970s slang and settings. Celebrity appearances include Dr.Jekyll and Mr. Hyde (Cedric the Entertainer) and Wife of Funkenstein (Aisha Tyler).

Funky Walker, Dirty Talker

Phil LaMarr plays Desperation Lee, the funky, afro-wearing host of the talk show Funky Walker, Dirty Talker who is a parody of 1970s blaxploitation film characters.

Geert

Geert is a Dutch boarder (Josh Meyers) who learns about American culture. He asks a lot of questions is supposed to be annoying. In his sketches, the main character that is supposed to get along with Geert is the only one who is annoyed by him: everyone else loves him. In the end of each sketch, Geert brings one thing that makes the main character like him (for example in the past; marijuana and his attractive sister).

Hoppy Potty

Hoppy Potty was a Scandinavian pop group featuring Gunter (Will Sasso), Yarl (Michael McDonald), Elka (Mo Collins), Inga (Nicole Sullivan), and Schtein (Pat Kilbane). The group was based on ABBA (but suspiciously sounds like Aqua's Barbie Girl, which is closer to modern Euro pop) and its name was an accented pronunciation of "Happy Party."[1] The group's debut song and video was "Meet Hoppy Potty," which had gone to #1 everywhere in the world except the United States. Sadly their second video (the Halloween spooktacular "Schpooky Potty") was also their last.

Inside Looking Out

Pat-Beth Lamontrose (Nicole Parker) and Dontell Lamontrose (Jordan Peele) are an interracial couple who sing and preach against bigotry, despite the fact that Pat-Beth is unintentionally racist. They seem to love each other very deeply despite Pat-Beth's racist comments. In later skits, Dontell realizes what Pat-Beth is really saying and tries to correct her or, failing that, shut her up.

Jack/Jaq, The UBS Guy

Jack/Jaq (Phil LaMarr) was a hyperactive delivery man for UBS. He wore a signature brown shirt and shorts, like the uniform worn by employees of the company the skit spoofed, UPS. The UBS Guy loved his job enthusiastically, but he also appeared in sketches outside his workplace. In one episode he stated that he loves his job because his dad and grandpa did the job before him.

In a season three sketch, the UBS Guy met the Vancome Lady (Nicole Sullivan) and replaced her as the god of a futuristic Planet of the Apes-type society.

Kappa Kappa Kappa Sorority

Kappa Kappa Kappa (KKK) is a sorority house at USC filled with popular, slutty girls Amber (Jill Michelle Meleán), Gisele (Daniele Gaither), Hayden (Debra Wilson), Mackenzie (Stephnie Weir), Savannah (Nicole Parker), Taylor (Kathryn Fiore), and Toby (Mo Collins). Guest star Trish Stratus also played a member of the Kappa Kappa Kappa.

Although the girls genuinely seem to mean well, their behavior tends to be unconsciously cruel or destructive. If they make an unpopular girl a "Kappa for a day," they will play what they interpret as typical sorority tricks to try to make her feel welcome but which are horribly cruel (such as sneaking the girl out into public while she is asleep and leaving her outside naked.) Despite being aware of the similarity between their initials and that of the Ku Klux Klan (they always introduce themselves as the "Kappa Kappa Kappa, or KKK--but the good kind!"), they wear white hooded sweatshirts with the letters 'KKK' written on them and often use fire while dressed this way. They once tried to "pass the torch of brotherhood" while dressed this way and attempted to give $100 to an African-American married couple with a baby; unsurprisingly, the couple thought they were a lynch mob and ran away from them. Another time they left a flaming cherries jubilee on the front lawn of an elderly black couple. Their competitors are the Zeta Iota Tau (ZIT for short).

Ka-Son

Ka-Son (Nicole Randall Johnson), also spelled as "Kayshawn" or "Queshon", is a short-tempered, bitchy, overbearing African American woman, who does her jobs way too seriously and has a little sympathy for customers. She is most notable for her long, beaded braids, long and sharp nails, shrill voice, and quick speaking.

In her debut sketch (called "Partial Payment"), Ka-Son was a telephone operator for Comcast. She was talking to a customer (Keegan-Michael Key), whose cable was out. They argued about companies allowing you to make a partial payment (she even said that she had "the skills, and the booty, and the gorgeous hair", but she did not have "the time"). She was also a DJ in college.

When talking to customers, Ka-Son often becomes angered with them and starts to argue with them. She then puts them on hold in the middle of their sentences so she can calm down. However, she often gets annoyed again and yells at them towards the end of the conversation. During arguments, she often calls the customer a piece of dookie (or simply "dookie"), a dookie head, or fecal matter.

Ka-Son's catchphrases are "You're welcome!" (which is often shouted at the customer after they are annoyed by her and shout, "Thank you!") and "Dookie head!".

She has 4 appearances.

Larry Felmore

Lawrence "Larry" Felmore (Michael McDonald) is a short-tempered, sarcastic, celebrity-obsessed geek, who gets very angry when someone insults his favorite actors.

Larry also tends to cause riots (which include throwing candy bars, yelling at people in a movie theatre, and even pointing a loaded sub-machine gun).

Larry lives in his mother's basement at home, as mentioned by Larry sometimes.

Although it may seem like Larry is the only person out there like that, he meets a woman named Carrie Felmore (Nicole Parker), who is just like him, and falls in love.

Larry often threatens people that he will break their noses, or blow their heads off with his gun.

Larry's catch phrase is "Shut your big, fat, stupid mouth!"

Larry works at a concession stand at a theatre and a video store.

Larry's number 1 favorite actor in the world is Justin Guarini, as revealed in "Oscar Madness".

Larry will often eavesdrop on conversations and loudly interrupt, saying that the actor they are insulting is amazing, and usually orders them to "shut your big, fat, stupid mouth!".

Leona Campbell

Stephnie Weir plays Mrs. Leona Campbell, a kind, elderly southern woman who likes wearing leisure suits and has a habit of catching people in stupid situations off guard with her truthful commentary, making them look like fools. She does this with no malicious intent, and is rather kind. Mrs. Campbell often mentions how the situation reminds her of her best friend Zelda. Zelda is implied to be over-weight and has yet to appear in a sketch.

Leona's Catchphrases:

  1. "Oh, my goodness!"
  2. "Really...?"
  3. "Honey, you know what?"

When she says "really...?" she does so with a very hoarse voice for comedic effect. One sketch shows Leona is a fit and durable woman being she was run over by a large SUV and was trampled by it for 5 miles. She has sold her house for the odd price of $900,000.01.

Lida Rosario and Melina Jacinto

Lida Rosario Vázquez[1] (Nicole Sullivan) and Melina Jacinto (Debra Wilson) are two promiscuous, sarcastic and purposely loud Hispanic girls from Los Angeles. Their ethnicity is never stated, but their exaggerated Spanish accents could be Mexican, Puerto Rican or Dominican. Lida and Melina have run a beauty salon, worked at a convenience store, appeared as guests on the et Ricky Martin by intrusion, and appeared on MTV's Spring Break. When they appeared on the "Jerry Springer" show, Jerry assaulted Rosa on stage. Melina is frequently called "lesbiana" by Lida, but neither of the two are lesbian.

Lida and Melina's arch-nemesis is Rosa (mostly unseen, but played in three sketches by Mo Collins), a "skanky slut" whom they blame for stealing their boyfriends. Lida and Melina idolize Selena, even calling her a saint on occasion. Lida and Melina also refer to Rosa as a "dead bitch," and a "cabrona." or "skankabrona". Lida often calls Melina by the name Lili. Lida has a mild obsession with "doing men" as she happens to call it. When she is thinking, she says "umm..." repeatedly, which, caused by their accents, sounds like "oom". They refer to their breasts as "tetas" and the two characters make repeatedly comment on Melina's "tetas" being larger. Their catch phrases include "Oh My Gaaaaaaaaaaawwd!", "Why she/he gotta be so stupid?"

The Lillian Verner Game Show

Season nine introduced a recurring sketch, The Lillian Verner Game Show, with Paul Vogt playing flamboyant host Dale Priskett. This mock game show involved contestants vying for products that are spoofs of Lillian Vernon products. A recurring character, Gail Cinder (played by Stephnie Weir), would always return as the show's reigning champion. This sketch also featured MADtv writer Michael Hitchcock as the game show's announcer, Simian Dyson (Hitchcock's only character on MADtv). Jeff Probst once guest-starred in place of Paul Vogt.

Lords of the Bling

This three part series was a blaxploitation parody of the Lord of the Rings series of films. The main protagonists were Fro-ho, played by Lil' Kim (Debra Wilson), later recast to Mary J. Blige (Daniele Gaither), and Tinsel the Elf, played by a very effeminate Sisqo (Aries Spears), who have been delegated to destroying an evil piece of "bling." They would be assisted by Bill Cosby (also played by Spears) as "Randolph the Ghost Dad." The primary antagonist was Kazaam, played by Shaquille O'Neal (also by Spears), who led an army of soldiers called Kobesuks (Kobe Sucks) (all played by Bobby Lee). In the third film he was assisted by Ja Rule (Jordan Peele). At the end of the series, the "bling" would be anti-climatically thrown into the "Lake of Fire", a small pool of red liquid. Aries Spears was the only cast member that appeared in all three parts.

Lorraine Swanson

Lorraine Swanson, played by Mo Collins is a confused, middle-aged woman from Fridley, Minnesota who gets into trouble when failing to comply with people's instructions. Lorraine wears high, elastic-waist track pants into which she tucks her shirt. Lorraine also wears an unbuttoned knit sweater (usually red) and her trademark over-sized thick glasses. She speaks with a very thick Fargo accent.

Lorraine has many dogs and a huge family, including her obese husband, Carl (played by Paul Vogt in later seasons), and her overweight son, Carl Jr., both of whom videotape her zany exploits (often taped on location). Lorraine very rarely but indeed runs nude and/or has run-ins with the police during these tapings. She has a remarkable ability of finding the worth of objects, as seen on a sketch where Lorraine participates in The Price Is Right. Lorraine also has a daughter, named Bobby (Bobby Lee) and a son named Mohammed only seen on "Lorraine Goes Camping". Lorraine's catchphrases are "Uh-huh-huh-huh!" (a nervous tic combining a laugh and cough), "Huh?!" (usually spoken before someone is done talking), and "Gaaaaawd, that's/you're cute".

Every sketch features a certain word Lorraine cannot pronounce; she repeatedly interrupts the other character's correct pronunciation several times before going "Uh-huh-huh-huh!" Mo Collins plays Lorraine in a Lady Marmalade parody involving the characters of Lorraine Swanson, Dot Goddard, Melina Jacinto and Ms. Swan.

Lorraine appeared 34 times in the run of MADtv. She was in seasons 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, and 13. Mo Collins came back for the series finale with Lorraine taking pledges in MADtv Gives Back.

Lowered Expectations

Lowered Expectations is a humorous interpretation of the typical dating service where expectations are obviously lowered. Sitting on a sofa, people leave a small message that will be heard by callers by dialing a certain combination of numbers assigned to each person. Lowered Expectation's camera man is seen only very rarely, and the camera man has been ridiculed by the character of Ms. Swan, being called a "bimbo" among other things. In early episodes, the skit was introduced by Mrs. Not Nice (played by Debra Wilson). Voice in off: Nicole Sullivan.

Marvin Tikvah

Marvin Tikvah (Michael McDonald) is an obese, lecherous Jewish film director with a predilection for prostitutes, cocaine and odd combinations of food. Marvin's children have appeared on the show: Mindy (Nicole Sullivan) is Marvin's oldest daughter; his other daughter is Michelle (Alex Borstein). (Borstein also appeared as Marvin's wife, Shelly.) Marvin also has a son, Sheldon (Ike Barinholtz). Mo Collins played several characters named Shelly; all were different and had some relationship to Marvin (doctor, fitness trainer, personal assistant). Marvin's catchphrase is: "Shelly!", followed by an awkward silence and then Marvin saying, "COME ON!!". Marvin's accent made the word "on" sound like "awn."

Mrs. Barone

Jewel Barone (Mary Scheer) is a mature lady with a gravel voice, she is extreme chain-smoker who never gets ill from smoking, though everyone around her seems to fall sick, like her daughter Angie, played by Nicole Sullivan. Mrs. Barone appeared several times during seasons one, two and three and made a cameo in the Lowered Expectations sketch, that was her last scene in the show before Scheer left MADtv in 1998. Mrs. Barone's catchphrase was: Oh, yes! There it is... (while she is smoking).

Mrs. Vigor

Mrs. Vigor (Mary Scheer) (A.K.A. "The Killer Grandma") is an elderly woman, who kills people by feeding them poisoned brownies.

Once, Mrs. Vigor also tried to kill her grandson with a brick.

Ms. Swan

Bunny Swan

Bunny Swan (Alex Borstein), also known as Ms. Swan, was born on November 25, 1966 (although in one sketch from 2000, she said she was two years old, and once she stated that she was over 100 years old) and lives at 1040 North Las Palmas (the address for Hollywood Center Studios, at the time home to MADtv). She is 5' 2" and weighs 145 lbs., as shown on a sketch when she goes to the DMV. Ms. Swan works as a manicurist at the Gorgeous Pretty Beauty Nail Salon (which she mispronounces as "Goja Pitty Booty Nay Salon"), or the Gorgeous Beauty Nail Salon for short.

Ms. Swan's ethnicity and native country are unclear. In one sketch it is revealed that Ms. Swan is from the fictional country of Kouvaria, near the North Pole. Although in one sketch where she is leaving a chain of her salons, the setting of the area is very Asian. MADtv execs insist the character was based on the singer Björk. (She was compared to Björk in one sketch, was referred to as Icelandic by the Vancome Lady in another, and wore Björk's infamous swan dress in another.) When a man asked her where she was from, she replied she lived downtown. One sketch shows Ms. Swan being fluent in Spanish while using an ATM. She told a man in a bar that her mother was Spanish, but her father was from Space. In Swan: The Homecoming, a movie she made with Garry Marshall, her father was played by Mark Hamill, and it was implied that she had another sister: Marcia Swan. Kitty Swan was also introduced as her sister in another sketch, but the sisters may be a single person, named Kitty-Marcia. Borstein claims the character was at least partially inspired by her Hungarian grandmother. In an early sketch, the character was supposed to have been a wig-maker. In another sketch, Ms. Swan goes to a restaurant with her sister, Kitty Swan, to meet two American men, and the two converse in Hungarian and Czech. She has also been shown to have a pet dog named JuJu Bee.

In all of her sketches, except the sketch where she goes on a date where she wears Björk's swan gown, she is wearing her work clothes.

In the sketches, people usually ask Ms. Swan questions, but she never gives a straight answer, driving them insane. She usually says, "Okay, I'll tell you everything" (which she pronounces "okay, I teh yu evrteen"), and "He look-a like-a man", both stemming from her debut sketch, in which she could not identify a robber. In the course of the discussion, she will reply, about an obvious detail, that the growing-impatient questioner "didn't say that before" when formulating the question. She also knows to lie and be cunning, which makes her complex in that oftentimes the viewer is unsure of whether she is being dumb or crafty or simply annoying.

Ms. Swan also tends to purse her lips, saying "thanks to you," after she feels another character has helped her. In one sketch, Ms. Swan auditions for the Spice Girls and was unable to follow simple directions and spoke the lyrics (incorrectly as well) rather than singing them, which made the director yell at her.

When on Lowered Expectations, she ridiculed the camera man. When she is in a sketch with Michael McDonald, she often refers to him as a "monkey in the bush", humorously insinuating his being a homosexual.

Ms. Swan made a cameo appearance on the TV show Family Guy (in which Borstein voices several characters), in the episode Don't Make Me Over.

On February 8, 2011 an unexpected video surfaced of Mrs.Swan in a parody of Black Swan. This video can be found on youtube.com. Made independently of MadTV, the parody was created by Alex Bornstein and her husband, Jackson Douglas.

Noodles & Nippy

Noodles (Jordan Peele) & Nippy (Crista Flanagan) are two clowns (The Hype Jingleberries) who try to teach people the art of krumping. The two often preface their demonstrations by describing, somewhat menacingly, how krumping helps them control their urges of criminal and violent behavior. Ironically, then, most of their demonstrations involve Nippy taking some sort of physical abuse from Noodles, such as getting shoved or hit in the face, then allaying the audience's concerns for her safety by stating repeatedly, "That's just the krump," while holding back tears.

Prehistoric Glamazon Huntresses, AD

Prehistoric Glamazon Huntresses, AD is a parody of TV shows like Xena, Cleopatra 2525 and Sheena from the late 1990s/early 2000s period, with female characters with superpowers trapped in pre-modern times. Like these shows, Glamazon Huntresses are equipped with revealing outfits, bad props, cheesy dialogue, and terrible acting. In each subsequent sketch, familiar events took place that were consistent with the real shows, i.e. that actors were changed from one episode to the next (The character of Mikayla was played by 3 different actresses), dead characters came back to life from episode to episode (Mikayla died constantly) and every episode ended in exactly the same way (Preparing to battle the 'Giant Red Space Ant'). Like Xena, there was a strong lesbian undertone built into the sketch centering around Mikalya and her 'sister' Takka. Prehistoric Glamazon Huntresses, A.D. is created and produced by Dr. and Mrs. Ira Finkleberg. Debra Wilson as Charme (Alexis Dubane), Stephnie Weir as Rebecca Finkleberg (Zamula Kincaid) and Mo Collins as Cheri Sheldon (Takka). It is implied that Weir's "Huntress" character was cast only because her parents were producers of the program.

Catchphrases:

  • "Hunt-RESSes, ATTACK!"
  • "You are not a scientist from the future, as I am."
  • "Ex-CELLent work, hunt-RESSes!"

Real **********ing Talk

Real **********ing Talk is a recurring skit on MADtv and a show-within-a-show. It spoofs other forum-style shows such as Hardball with Chris Matthews and Real Time with Bill Maher. However, unlike other talk shows, Real **********ing Talk is known for its excessive use of (censored) foul language. The ten asterisks in the title are heavily implied to represent the word motherfucker, though this is never confirmed due to FCC broadcast restrictions.

The host of Real **********ing Talk is Dollar Bill Montgomery (Aries Spears), who appears in every episode of the show. His personality is sharp, sassy and borderline belligerent. Montgomery's moderating style is a parody of other "sassy" political talking heads like John McLaughlin and Bill O'Reilly. However, unlike them, Montgomery uses foul language to insult his guests, especially the "token white guest" and Woogie Johnson (Tommy Davidson).

The black guests usually appear to be based on many cultural stereotypes (cheesey Apollo comedian, black-power conspiracy theorist, sassy black woman, etc.) and they use ethnic slang to convey their points. However, some of these guests surprise the audience by making very articulate responses to the questions posed to them. Many times, they may be antagonized by Montgomery as much as, if not more than, the token white guest. At least one "token white" guest has appeared in all episodes of Real **********ing Talk. The white guest tends to be well-educated and high-strung, such as conservative political commentators Pat Buchanan or liberal political commentators like Michael Kinsley. One guest who has appeared multiple times was F. Michael McCrosky (Michael McDonald), who inadvertently offended Dollar Bill in every appearance, thus ending the episode due to everyone in that episode wanting to kill him or beat him up.

Real **********ing Talk appeared 14 times during season 7, 8, 9, and 10.[2]

Reality Check

Reality Check was a talk show on Madtv's version of BET hosted by Belma Buttons (Aries Spears) and Tovah McQueen (Debra Wilson), two obese black women. The sketches would begin by each of them partaking in food, and saying that it is "so good" that they would inflict physical harm on each other. Then they would introduce a white guest who gets routinely insulted by Belma and Tovah until the guest makes a witty comeback, such as Tom Ridge (Will Sasso) telling "the two of them to get four chairs and sit down." Belma and Tovah would retaliate by first getting excitied like " Tova, do you feel something coming on? Oh, Belma, yes I do. Then they would count down from three to one and then take turns berating the guest, then ending the show by telling the guest to "think about what we said" and then say "This is Reality Check and we are through!" after Belma usually would get a craving for food. The only person Belma and Tovah liked was Bill Clinton (Sasso) because he put himself down; like Belma and Tovah themselves insulted people. Belma once lost weight by "The Subway Diet" (eating trash left by people on the subway) and declared her personal trainer to be her new best friend, until going into shock, and then reverting back to her gluttonous ways.

Reality Check featured ads for products based on black stereotypes, e.g., Red Kool-Aid, Nike T-max shoes and Red Rooster Hot Sauce. Tovah McQueen and Belma Buttons appeared 14 times during season 5,6,7,8, & 10.[3]

Rusty Miller

Rusty Miller (Michael McDonald) is a red-headed college student at Cal State-Fullerton. Originally, the skits focused on Rusty's college life and his attempts to fit in with his peers, despite his nerdy behavior and annoying tendencies (such as his penchant for Zima and obnoxious tendency to correct people’s grammar). In later episodes, the character was revamped as the host of a public access television show, "This and That with Rusty", featuring interviews with celebrities such as Drew Barrymore, David Boreanaz and Mandy Moore. A semi-recurring gag reveals that he has a gargantuan penis (in his words, "Not just in length, but girth too").

Sean the Floor Leader

A series of skits involving Sean Gidcomb (Michael McDonald), the floor leader of a business, watching over the office. He, for some reason, never leaves his swivel chair unless he falls off it while rolling back into his quarters or out of the room.

In one episode, Sean was fired and had been replaced by Shane (Neil Patrick Harris). Sean had trained him for the job, so much that he turned into a clone of Sean himself swivel chair and all. In the end Shane reveals that he only acted like Sean to get on his good side.

His catch phrases are "sneaky snake", referring to one of the employees talking about him behind his back, also "and I see ya", spinning and pointing at the person directly behind him. also he threw in a "uh hello" and "Uh, are you sure" in stuttering fashion, mocking the new employee that does not fear him "Beth the back-stabbing beaver" (Nicole Parker).

Sherry the Stripper

Stephnie Weir plays Sherry, a stripper who can never quite get through her dances without seeming unattractive or hurting herself. No matter what she does wrong she always insists on dancing even though the guys insist that they feel empathy in some way. As a gag sometimes her hair will fall off her head implying that it's a wig.

Snapshot Stories

Snapshot Stories were short, child-like narrations accompanied by still moving pictures, that usually are more gruesome than the narrations imply. Cast members would narrate their own stories that start out simple and end in violence while the narration remains naïve, forcing the viewer to watch the skit in order to understand the jokes.

Spishak

Spishak was a fictional company that created different products that appeared in MADtv sketches. Many of the commercials are of poor quality and the products failed miserably to be satirical. The Spishak Spokesman was played by David Herman, Pat Kilbane, and Josh Meyers.

Spy vs Spy

Short animations of the Spy vs Spy comic were produced for the show.

Stan McNer the Java Man

Stan McNer (Pat Kilbane) is a man who has bulging eyes and is addicted to caffeine, and thus highly valuing his job at a local coffee shop. however, after losing his job he goes on a tour at the Doldgers plant (Folgers knock off). Stan just narrowly survived the tour sans-coffee to prove he "didn't need the bean" but falls of the wagon so fast and makes a hilarious scene involving many pots of different coffee, a giant coffee machine, him licking coffee off the floor, surviving a stun-gun and him ultimately getting banished with the aid of de-caf. His only recourse was to meet up with the big wigs of the Doldgers company, and make his own blend of coffee, "Stans own". (he drinks so much coffee so even when he pees it out it is pure, rich and robust).

Stick Chicks

A parody of Charlie's Angels; Champagne (Nicole Sullivan), Autumn (Debra Wilson), and Echo (Alex Borstein) are international crimefighters who hide their identities by working in a shopping mall food court selling "Wiener on a Stick", hence their nickname.

Stuart Larkin

File:StuartMadTV.jpg

Michael McDonald as Stuart Larkin, and his mother, Doreen played by Mo Collins.

Stuart Douglas Larkin (Michael McDonald) is a little boy with a constantly dazed and vacant look on his face. His wacky, borderline alcoholic, thick Wisconsin-accented mother Doreen (Mo Collins), nags, scolds and screams at him for getting into mischief. One of her tagphrases is "What did Momma say about that, Stuart? What did Momma say?" For example, he is often seen eating different junk foods, and when his mother inquires about them, he simply replies that he found them on the floor, then shoves them in his mouth. Even though Stuart appears very anti-social, and naive about the world it was mentioned in some episodes (such as "Stuart Takes Piano Lessons") that he is a genius. This was further shown when he had shown exceptional piano talent on only his second lesson.

Stuart's childhood traumas, such as his father leaving the family, are often mentioned. No matter when the sketch takes place, Stuart's dad has always left the previous Tuesday, after meeting an Asian woman through the internet.

Stuart's catchphrases are "Look what I can do!", "Let me do it!", "Dooooon't!", and "I don't wanna say!".

Stuart tends to kick anyone who he does not want near him with his legs, he lies on the floor and uses his long legs to keep them away from him, sometimes using a violent kick. Stuart occasionally calls his genital area his "danger zone", or calls his genital his "googoo". When pushed too far, his boyish falsetto is replaced by a deep, demonic voice. This voice is used when Stuart enters his "dark place", a glimpse into Stuart's inner turmoil.

Several skits showed Stuart annoying his obese next-door neighbor, Harvey Muckenthaler (Paul Vogt), who apparently cannot stand. Stuart's original name was "Scott".

Since Mo Collins left the show, Stuart had appeared in only one sketch per season.

Stuart appeared 36 times during the run of MADtv. He was in seasons 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, and 12. There was also a sketch used in the series finale that Mo pre-taped the voice of Doreen and they did a montage of Stuart.

Doreen appeared 31 times during the run of MADtv. She was in season 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9 and 10. Mo Collins came back for the series finale and recorded the voice of Doreen during a montage of Stuart.[4]

Superstitious Knights

Carl Hall (Keegan-Michael Key) and Ty Gray (Jordan Peele) are extremely superstitious and trained in recognizing traditional bad-luck omens. When an accident occurs because of (or indicating) bad luck, they try to break the curse by performing lengthy, choreographed dance routines, with the phrase "Man Up", "Man Up". In one episode, they appeared on "Deal or No Deal", annoying Howie (played by Michael McDonald), tried to talk to the Banker, and even though very close, they lost the chance to win a $1 million, but were happy to leave with $400.

The Depressed Persian Tow Truck Man

Mofaz the Depressed Persian Tow Truck Man (Michael McDonald) scoffs when his customers (also, once one of his daughters, Mofina (Ike Barinholtz), and a father of a new-born) complain about their problems. He describes his miserable life, inadvertently making them feel better about themselves. Mofaz' complaints involve his job, his nagging kids, his cruel and violent parents, his grotesque, unfaithful wife, who may be a monkey, his mother-in-law (whom he calls his "Osama Bin Law"), and life in a one-room apartment with 19 noisy family members. His daughter (Ike Barinholtz) has camel hooves and his wife who now supposedly weighs more or less than 2001 pounds. Mofaz speaks poor English, often searching for words with his catchphrase "Uhh, how you sayyy?", and using the expressions "hellaaa, hellaaa, hellaaa" for "testicles," and "kraimenech" for "vulva". He also always had a cigarette in his hand he would smoke throughout the skit and he once explains that he was a smoking problem, which gives him very bad breath. Also, he does not like to take care of his health, including toenails the size of eagle talons, his "Areolas" are "the size of "Little Caesars" Pizza! Pizzas!", and his testicles hang front to back (and make a sound like "Click clack, click clack click clack"). In each skit, he would be given a different title, following the form "The Depressed Persian Tow Truck Man Who [list of problems mentioned during the skit]".

In the skit with Hillary Clinton (Nicole Parker), Mofaz claimed that his full name is "Mofaz Iddi Amine Popot Stalin bin Laden Manson Johnson".

Mofaz appeared 14 times during seasons 6,7,8,9,10,11,12, & 13.[5]

The Eracists

The Eracists were a group of motivational speakers who toured schools and community centers to denounce bigotry, while unknowingly exhibiting bigoted behavior. The Eracists were Anne (Alex Borstein) (whose character was in a wheelchair), Debbie (Nicole Sullivan), Steve (Phil LaMarr) (later replaced by Reggie (Aries Spears)), and Hugh (Will Sasso). In one episode it was stated that Anne is in a wheel chair because of Debbie. When Reggie first appeared he mentioned he is a fan of Steve and sometimes imagines their dancing together.

There were a total of 6 Eracists sketches during seasons 4 and 5. Nicole, Will, and Alex's characters Anne, Debbie, and Hugh appeared in all 6. Phil's character of Steve appeared in 4 episodes. And Aries's character of Reggie appeared in only 3 episodes.[6]

The Kim Jong-il Show

This was a talk show hosted by North Korean dictator Kim Jong-il (Bobby Lee). Whenever an audience member does not laugh at a joke he says he would have them shot. Apparently, it is a mandatory show on state television. Guests on the show have included Renee Zellweger (Nicole Parker), JC Chasez (himself), and Donald Trump (Frank Caliendo).

The Parker Sisters

Chris Hogan and Lisa Kushell play Vonda and Wanda Parker, two ugly, nerdy sisters who are constantly looking for a good clean lover. They are both waiting to lose their virginity until their wedding days. Catchphrase: "You ain't gettin' none of this, or none of this, and especially, none of this." - Wanda Parker / Vonda Parker.

The Silver Fox

Michael McDonald plays Isadore Kruskal, an elderly and forgetful man who hosts a television show called The Silver Fox, which is filmed in his home at Boca Grove Condos. He has also appeared on 7am Condo Report, and has a romantic history with fellow Boca Grove resident, Muriel Westig. Ike Barinholtz plays Duncan, Isadore's drug addicted nephew who lives with him.

Isadore Kruskal appeared 5 times during seasons 10, 11, & 12.[7]

The Vancome Lady

Kathleen "Kathy" Wajonowski (Nicole Sullivan), better known as "The Vancome Lady", is a self-absorbed, despicable, mean, cynical, bigoted, rude woman with a gaudy appearance (even though the character did not originally have extreme make-up, hair, or clothes).

The Vancome Lady is the very first MADtv recurring character, appearing twice in the show's 1st episode, and was Nicole Sullivan's most popular character.

The Vancome Lady takes her name from Lancôme cosmetics and the fact that she once worked at a make-up counter in a fashionable department store.

The Vancome Lady crushingly insults every character she comes into contact with, her insults often resembling the jokes of insult comics in the tradition of Don Rickles or Triumph the Insult Comic Dog.

The Vancome Lady moves frequently, and has a different job in each sketch, because she alienates everyone around her. When being fired, she thanks her male employer for "letting me sleep with you" and exits, leaving her ashamed boss behind. In one skit, the Vancome Lady does not have any notable job, instead being a rude neighbor handing out candy to trick-or-treaters, insulting them and their parents until being run out of town by an angry mob just like in the previous towns that she lived in.

The Vancome Lady's catch phrases are "Tcha... you know what? Uh-uh!" (in one sketch, the Vancome Lady was even a host of a gameshow called "Tcha, Ya Know What?"), "La la la..." and "Christmas on a cracker".

In one skit, the Vancome Lady trades insults with Marvin Tikvah, until they find out that they both enjoy hurting people. Marvin offers the Vancome Lady an ideal place to work: Fox. While in another sketch, titled "Planet Of The Vancome Ladies (a parody of Planet of the Apes)," the Vancome Lady plays God.

Trivia

The Vancome Lady appeared in seasons 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, and 9, and appeared 25 times during the run of MADtv.[8]

Trina Moss

Trina (Mo Collins) is a blonde haired woman who has fears of many things. She has had many unfortunate situations that have happened to her (like getting a boil on her butt, having a hairy moss-like patch grow on her shoulder, a skin graft from a corpse-containing the nipple of the corpse-on her head, and even being sodomized by a horse as a child then being put in a body cast). Although she has these unlucky situations she always stays happy about her life. Trina finds a man that likes her, and is even as unlucky as her. She explains to him in one sketch that she has never been in her room alone with a boy since she gave her uncle a sponge-bath when she was a child. She also became the assistant manager of an IHOP. She mentions in many sketches that she cannot bear children. She always rubs her nose when she gets upset. She makes a "ra-ra-ra-ra-ra!" or just "Ara" when she is excited. She vomits when she feels nervous. She nearly marries her boyfriend, only to find out at the wedding that he is her twin brother and both their parents are black.

Trina Moss appeared 11 times during seasons 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, & 9.[9]

X News

A short-lived sketch meant to satirize "edgy" teen news programs like MTV News, X News was hosted by Marsh and Amy. They presented news with a stereotypical teen attitude. Amy later stylized her name to "Ah-mee", much to the joy of Marsh, who stylizes his name as Mersha to mock her. Ah-mee stresses her rebellious nature, although hints have been dropped that she's actually from a upper middle class family (her parents bought her a car and paid her college tuition), while Marsh takes every opportunity present to insult her. Marsh almost constantly seems to confuse "the Man" (an Establishment figure) with "Batman", and has latent racist tendencies (he once said cops treat him like he's black because he steals stuff). Amy was portrayed by Nicole Sullivan, and Marsh by David Herman.

X News appeared on MAD TV during seasons 1 and 2, and had a total of 5 appearances on the show.[10]

Yvonne Criddle

Yvonne Criddle (Daniele Gaither) is a self proclaimed evil woman. She has no regard for common decency and displays extreme responses to the most minor inconveniences. Based on her two appearances, her wardrobe consists of very strange shirts, all of which depict flowers. She uses almost every gap in conversation to repeat her point. Although she's despicable she's an extremely honest and calm person who has no problem telling authorities all about what she's done; when being punished for her actions she presents no resistance whatsoever.

Yvonne Criddle appeared in season 10 and 11. She appeared in two sketches total in episodes 1010 and 1117.[11]

Susan Whitfield

Lisa Kushell plays Susan Whitfield an unlucky and ugly teenage girl who desperately seeks to divert attention to herself, through telling people about her tragic histories and situations. She is very lonely because she has no friends and defines herself as someone special which does not care what others say about her. Each episode in where she appeared, ends abruptly when, by a particular situation, people who are with her end up leaving the place, leaving her alone and in darkness.

She has the distinction of speaking with a tone in which it seems as if everything she says it is as a question.

Bon Qui Qui

Anjelah Johnson plays Bon Qui Qui, an obnoxious, rude woman working at King Burger. Bon Qui Qui almost always ends up calling security for no reason and treats customers very badly. Bon Qui Qui flirts with a guy then dances with him at the end of the sketch. She only appears once - Which means she is not a recurring character.

However, the video with Bon Qui Qui has over 50 Million views on YouTube.

References


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